Lately on the internet, I’ve been coming across a lot of articles about life lessons, things you should/shouldn’t be doing at/by a certain age, and most of it just sounds really preachy and judgemental. Every human being is different, we all walk a separate path and experience life differently. While some things are common knowledge and could be applied to everyone, having specific recommendations of what ‘everyone should do in their 30’s’ or ‘what women should be doing in their early 20’s’ just feels weird to me.
Human beings are constantly experiencing and forever evolving. I’m not the same person I was 4 years ago, and that person was radically different from the girl I was 4 years before that. I’m not old, but I’m also not as young as I once was. I have lots of memories, have seen and done some crazy things, and on my journey I had definitely learned a lot. That being said, here are some things I personally have learned – which could potentially apply to you (but maybe not)!
- If you’re going to skip school, do it right. Don’t hang out in the hallways or on school grounds, hoping you don’t bump into your teachers. I never remember the stuff I talked about during these times, only when I got out and DID things with people. In the same respect, if you’re going to go to class, then focus! If I actually went to class, I went to learn and do the work. If I wanted to chat and play around on my phone, I’d rather do that without a teacher yelling at me and maybe giving me detention.
- This is going to sound really cliché, but life is too short to do things you don’t want to do. Obviously this doesn’t apply to responsibilities like work, paying bills, etc., but as far as your personal life goes, you have full say. I’m not going to regret not seeing that horror movie with my friends (because I hate horror films) just because everyone else was going. I will of course attend things to support my friends/family/partners, but there is a difference between support and submitting. I won’t go to that party if I am having a bad anxiety day, because I won’t have fun and I will likely regret it. If you’re my friend, you’ll understand that and have my back. Don’t guilt me because ‘you haven’t seen me in so long’. We never know how long we get on this Earth, I’d really rather not spend it doing activities I have no interest in.
- It’s okay to be sad sometimes. Or mad, or whatever. There seems to be this vibe imprinted on us that says we need to be happy, or at least always striving for happiness. And yeah, I love being happy, it’d be cool if I could be like that always – but that’s not the case. That’s not the case for a lot of people. It seems futile to constantly work towards happiness, do all of these things that are apparently the stepladder towards the ultimate Gates of Eternal Happiness – because sometimes I will get sad, and sometimes things will just piss me off. Because I’m human, and it’s natural. All power to those who are usually content, and/or want to work on making themselves happier. But knowing myself, I could be at my highest point of happy – and then life (or my mind) sets off an emotional land mine and well, here I am crying into my roommate’s dog again. I know it won’t last forever, and I’m all right with that.
- The most toxic people in your life can be the hardest to remove. It always sucks when the realization finally dawns on you that your ‘good’ friend of 6+ years is actually someone you should have cut a long time ago. Sometimes these people are even family members, which makes it harder. I now have to ask myself the same questions when I am assessing a personal relationship. Does this person usually make me feel better after talking to/seeing them, or worse? What do we discuss when we talk? Do I feel safe with this person? This can be really hard to do, but once it’s done, you realized how much happier you feel without the negative energy. I never usually realize how unhappy I felt by their involvement in my life, until I no longer have them in it.
- Lipstick and lip stain can completely change a face. Sometimes if I’m too lazy or tired for full makeup, I just do foundation and then throw on some lipstick. My whole face instantly looks brighter and I appear more well put-together. Life hacks ftw.
I was too tired to think of more than five. Maybe I’ll add more at a later date!